The Men We Ought To Be

"But you, man of God... pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance, and gentleness." 

-1 Timothy 6:11

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The video below might have been specifically for the ladies, but I think men need to hear it as well! Take a look:

Too many times, especially in today's culture, we seem to be expected to lower our standards and settle for mediocrity; especially when it comes to dating and relationships.

Talking to men, and myself, for a second: we need to start stepping up to the plate when it comes to reflecting godly character in our lives and in our relationships. Fellow singles: are we making an effort to pursue the values listed in 1 Timothy 6:11? Those in relationships and marriages: are these values a part of your character and are you pursuing these values with your significant other?

Ladies: Do not settle for mediocrity. Make no mistake: We're not perfect and we never will be (Shocker, I know!), but if our lives are not reflecting the values in 1 Timothy 6:11, if we are not eagerly pursuing these things on a daily basis without you, we don't deserve to be with you.

And don't be afraid to call us out on it! Let's face it: men can be pretty clueless (Exhibit A: Me!), we are not mind readers (ala Mel Gibson in What Women Want), and often times we don't realize we are in error until someone else points it out (we're stubborn like that). If we're messing up, say it (In love, of course!).

So, gentlemen, let's start pursuing. And ladies, don't demand anything less from us!

RIGHTEOUSNESS

"The one who in faith gives oneself to the doing of God's will is righteous,

doing righteousness, and reckoned righteous by God."

- James 3:23

It's important to remember where righteousness comes from. It does not come from ourselves. On our own, we are not righteous. We cannot be righteous on our strength and ability. Our righteousness comes from having Christ in our lives. From seeking Him out. It's not something that is EARNED, but it is something that is GIVEN to us through faith in God.

We might be persecuted and ridiculed because we pursue righteousness. Count it as blessing. Let us stand out from what culture says (1 Peter 3:14). Training for righteousness comes from scripture. Therefore, we have to spend time in it in order to pursue righteousness.

In Christ, we know what is right. We know what is true. Are we pursuing that?

GODLINESS

"This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did."

- 1 John 2:5-6

According to the Holman Christian Dictionary, godliness is an attitude and style of life that acknowledges God's claims on human life and seeks to live in accordance with God's will.

Do we have respect for God and divinely ordained institutions? Do we love the church? Do we have a reverence for God and are we teachable? Are we seeking to become more like Christ on a daily basis?

It's important to be willing to learn, willing to be changed and to lay down our own pride, wisdom and understanding.

FAITH

"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

- Galatians 2:20

My treasure is in heaven. Not here. Are we living by faith and not by sight? Doubt is a part of life. We are all going to have doubts and there are going to be things that we are uncertain about.

But when push comes to shove, are we faithful? Do we remember the love that Christ has for us, that even when we didn't deserve it or earn it, he was faithful enough to take the cross in our place? Do we trust in the plan that God has for us? Not the plan of an easy life, but a full life lived with Him working in us, through us and for us? Friends, our faith is not blind. It is anchored in the truth of God's word. In the truth of His promise.

LOVE

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

- 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Do we truly seek to love people the way that God loves us? Are we pursuing love in our relationships? Without love, everything we do is worthless and empty.

If love does not motivate us to action, then it is all for nothing. In our relationships, we should be constantly striving to live out the love that God extended to us and continues to extend to us: a sacrificial love that overcomes all things. Love God, love people.   

ENDURANCE

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

- James 1:2-4

Life is hard, guys. Relationships are hard. The best things in life usually aren't the easy things, but the hard ones.

When things get tough, do we flail on commitments and wither away or do we stand firm ? Do we lean on God for help or do we try to tough it out on our own? Time will test all of us. Endurance comes from being tested. Are we willing to go through it or take the easy way out?

Let us be men that persevere and commit in our relationships.

GENTLENESS

"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."

- Ephesians 4:2

One of the issues I have had to deal with in my own walk with Christ has been my anger. My impatience. My desire for perfection and success in competition. When I failed, I used to lash out at those around me. Looking back, I was not always gentle. I was not always kind.

Anger is one letter away form danger. It's dangerous. Don't be ruled by anger, but be gentle to others. Be kind. Men, let's treat everyone with respect, gentleness, and grace. Let's put the needs of others above ourselves.   

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You know what the tricky thing is for us men when it comes to pursuing these values? It requires us to lay down our pride, and that can be a hard thing to do! In my own life, when I see a need or a problem, I want to be the one to fix it. I want to take the initiative. I want to take the first step. But really, the first step we need to take is one of surrender; acknowledging that I can't, but He can!

We are not righteous, godly, faithful, loving, enduring or gentle men on our own strength. All of these characteristics come as a result of allowing Christ to penetrate our lives and create in us a new heart and mind. These characteristics are counter-cultural and go against our own basic nature. In a "YOLO" society that encourages us to chase after short-term gratification and think of ourselves above others, it takes some pride swallowing to say "It's not about me."  

To be 6/11 men means acknowledging God is first. That others come first. It requires us to lay it down and say "Jesus, I need to change and become more like You."

Let's take that first step!

On The Run

"And I ran... 

I ran so far away

I just ran...

I ran all night and day

I couldn't get away."

- I Ran (So Far Away) by Flock of Seagulls

That song is probably the greatest one-hit wonder of all time. At least Top 5!

In this fast-paced world that we live, it seems like we are always running around. Running to and from places. Running everywhere or running nowhere. Running to stay ahead or running to catch up with everyone else.

Have we ever stopped for a moment to look at where our running takes us? To take note of where we are and where we're going? Who we're running life with? How far we've come and how much farther we need to go? Or maybe we're running from something... an unhealthy relationship, an addiction, a dangerous situation.

There have been plenty of times where we feel like we're running and running as far and as fast as we can from something, but then we stop and realize that we end up right back where we started.

Running away from danger is the wise thing to do, but where are we running to? Are we running to God in our time of need and crisis? Are we running away from one dangerous situation and right into another? Are we running towards others who can help us make wise choices or to people that will point us towards more danger?

RUN AWAY FROM DANGER

"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, 

but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body." 

- 1 Corinthians 6:18

Too many times we walk on the ledge of danger, checking to see how close we can get the edge before falling off. We bend the bar of morality, checking to see how far we can go without breaking it. Many times we play, as my pastor put it this past weekend, this game of Jenga with our lives, making little compromises here and there that we think are harmless, but eventually one of them will cause everything to come crashing down.

Is it worth playing this game with our lives? Is it worth losing valuable relationships? Great opportunities? Precious time?

We all, at one point or another, have pushed the limits. Tried to see how far we can go without having everything fall apart. From my own experience, there is no gain from it. There is nothing there but regret. We look back and ask ourselves how we could have been so dumb and reckless!

When the alarms go off in your head, telling you that this situation is not where you should be, run as fast as you can in the opposite direction.

RUN TO GOD

"The name of the Lord is a fortified tower; the righteous run to it and are safe." 

- Proverbs 18:10

When we run, we need to have a destination. And the only true place where we are safe is in the arms of Christ.

Many times we will run looking for comfort and safety in all the wrong places, chasing after things that ultimately cannot satisfy us. In Christ, there is forgiveness, healing, protection, and strength. All of which equip us for the challenges and temptations all of us will face in the future.

Temptations in life are not a matter of if, but when. Where we run to in the face of crisis is just as important as running from the crisis in the first place. Because if we don't end up in the arms of Christ and into the arms of someone or something else, we're setting ourselves up for failure.

RUN ON HIS PATH

"I run in the path of your commands, for you have broadened my understanding... Give me understanding, so that I may keep your law and obey it with all my heart. Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my heart toward your statute. and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; preserve my life according to your word." 

- Psalm 119:32, 34-37

Run on the path God has set for your life. Don't steer to the left or the right. Don't veer off course. Don't try and take shortcuts or detours. We have to keep our eyes set straight ahead, fixed on Christ.

Running on this path is one of sacrifice. If we are going to run on this path, we're going to have to drop some of the junk and the funk that distracts us from the blessings God has planned for us. Maybe it's an unhealthy relationship that needs to be severed, a call to move elsewhere, a career change... whatever it is, make the necessary changes and eliminate those unhealthy distractions from your life!

I'm starting to realize that in order to stay on this path and not allow compromises to drift me off course, extreme standards need to be set in order. I have to ask myself: How far am I willing to go to protect myself? To honor God? To run on His path?

RUN WITH PURPOSE

"Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize. Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air." 

- 1 Corinthians 9:24-26

How are we running: Are we running with strength, confidence and humility? Or in fear and timidity? 

Running a race requires alertness, readiness and awareness; It requires discipline, wisdom and focus. If you have ever trained for something, you know that it requires time, dedication and maximum effort if you're going to succeed. Are we putting in the kind of training necessary to run the race God has set for our lives? Or are we simply stumbling along?

We need to keep running, and continually prepare for the challenges of life in away that allows us to run strong.